They ruined my relationship with others to ruin my life.

They are ruining an older lady I like.

They won't stop molesting the older lady I like.

They're superstitious and controlling my life and others in it.

They want to take away my being able to sense things, they said it when I thought I closed the door aggressively but not slamming it.  They won't stop.

Get this, though...  I went to use the bathroom and closed the door aggressively to signal the person making the annoying noises to stop but not slamming it.  Then, they emitted I can never have my relationship.  People are acting like it all around from the monitoring me in private.  I was just trying to eat and my family was always on the verge imprinting a bemused smile to me.  The people monitoring me in private keep acting bemused and batshit crazy getting under my skin too.  Now, they won't stop bothering me, too.  I am worried they are not really women.

The people monitoring me in private are acting like I can't have a relationship with someone who likes me and who I like.

I'm not sure what's off.  I'm dressed.  I just had a meal with my family, and something seemed wrong about me, like it was too late to change how I was.  I feel funny about how some present themselves.  Already, I felt I was in for it.

I wish things were better for someone regarding some people in my life.

Please don't mistake my sincerity.

I want to do something smart, but I'm just going to bed.

The IMDb parody boards can't tell me what to do.

I think the people monitoring me in private are mad at me.

No wonder some people don't post.

What I say is not taken as important nor means anything to anyone.

Does Ellen DeGeneres believe in making others famous but not herself?

I wonder what my old peers are up to.

The last thing an old friend did was get upset I didn't assume to wait for her for a project, before she stopped talking to me normally.

My life is such a joke.  Things I say alter the course of my future because people think they can take my thoughts and jots the wrong way.

Did someone set me not to be accepted?  What's the problem now.  Who knows what will be decided tomorrow.

So, when I'm not in disagreement, what can I do?

Do people with older parents just copy older generations and force younger ones to accept it?

So, now what do I get to do?  No one trusts me but trusts my kinda crowd?

I blame my old friends and family in all its extension.

OK

I lost my friends and didn't make new ones.

Message Board

I said this:

Re: Are you afraid of what older adults tell you to do?

Someone else said this:

I don't do what no one tells me to



Okay, so am I the sacrifice?  Who did this?  I need to know.  Older people?  Is there something wrong with talking to me?  I may not have the same opinion tomorrow or when I wake up.

I'm not up for this kind of retarded excitement.  I wonder if I'll make it to bed.

I don't really trust the people monitoring me in private over her.

In the end, it's a racist "accident."

They put her in a position people can't refuse.  Also, putting someone in the face of a bipolar nation can only equal war.

They started to mention an older lady I like being mistreated in suggestive ways, like she doesn't matter as long as she's nice to me.

The people monitoring me in private keep beating at me.

What if no one was allowed to post about Ellen DeGeneres? or watch her show if they wanted to?

Other people are allowed to talk about Ellen DeGeneres, and I respected her first.

It doesn't matter what they say.

How can people tease me about a relationship with an older lady I already gave?  What are they always on about?  Did I lose it altogether?

I shouldn't be in trouble with people important in my life.

So, why can't these bad people be ignored?  They're simply up to no good.

The people monitoring me in private seem to be imprinting on my existence the influence of the ways of someone which I try to avoid.  I'm trying to ignore them, right now, because I'm not here to follow this.

The world is shit.

They're just a bunch of racist vagrants.

What are they counting on?  For some mixed race person to become a fair weathered celebrity but not live gloriously like people like Marilyn Monroe?

Marilyn Monroe

(image credit)

I can't sleep!

I'm having fun, but I'm not having fun with some of the things people waste time negotiating on about my life, like that I'm in trouble and nothing I do anyone likes to talk to me.

What can I do for my life?

I already had priorities set.

Funny Words I Thought Of

insecure

not "on rapport"

People have annoyed me and get onto me when I think about them in a certain way.

My life goes that my relationship with an older lady randomly pops up as being "stolen" by others I know.  It's so pathetic yet sad, people trying to be something at the last minute with some things but not caring to talk to me otherwise.

We are not all the same, and we are not all going to be!

Everyone went somewhat unnecessarily and insincerely wild about something it seemed like maybe I could get, but now it's used as a permanent disciplinary tool, by making it then not true for me, according to people monitoring me in private who negotiate with the people I talk to.

"Where is the love?"

Why can't we just ignore some things?

Like, some people don't get along, but we work on that.  You don't have to cancel all your other plans in the shadows.

A Guide to the Truth

I'll show you not to discipline me.

What if ... Younger people cannot be racist to me in one way, or else.

What if ... Older people can't "get" whatever they want, or else their generation doesn't matter, which I guess for some that's unfortunately already true.

I didn't really fight or hurt anyone like other people.

Funny people who can't have normal conversations.

Star From Dirty Dancing Looks Like Me - 1987

(image credit)

Dirty Dancing 1 will be on again.

Why did Generation X have to Learn Early Boomers but not Late Boomers.

Why are movies less than appealing cast combinations?

Why do some people have such a sense of humor when you stumble over something mentally?  Why not just move on and not scare people?

Why do I have to deal with some people?

I wonder when people "don't wanna..."  Maybe, they don't, now.

Hollywood is meaningless.

People act bad/mean.

You never even meet those people.  They are locked away in huge buildings and can't earn a living.

Who cares about Latinos and Europeans?  They just wanna fuck blondes.

I wonder why my parents had an eager girl like me turn out like this, especially my dad because he is American and white and my mom is Asian.

People become famous when they talk to me a little so they can't talk to me a lot.

Funny my dad doesn't address my mom's cooking but addresses her parenting, when we're in the 6th dimension.

Germans seem dangerous if unhappy.  Pathetic, though.

How sarcastic is "the look on people's faces" who emulate someone I actually still like because I accidentally spammed advice to my friends/family in 2007?  I never thought whatever people said, and I certainly never said anything like that to anyone.

Are Latinos etc. always looking to pretend there's a fight in me while a fight definitely comes out of them.

So, can we be friendly terms?  I'm not looking for a good time.

So, did you know people will blame other races for not working on their own? like their children in schools.  Lazy, God damn Americans.

The main character in Dirty Dancing 2 saw herself as more European in some way and said she was going to the Cuban club in a funny way, like she'll impress people to what lengths she'll go to say they're shit.

Why do people have to give me such a hard time?

No one gives a care about people telling only others to be overly careful like they need it.  That's rude.  Tell Ellen DeGeneres that, and you'd be in big trouble.

No one is perfect.

Only "white" people get away with it.

Simple as that.

I can't escape!!

Oh, I'm so sorry.  Not much else is happening.  I feel like I'm drunk, too.  I didn't post it, just thought it.

So, someone was nice to me but now overly critical like people do when they are drunk.  Race.

Harvard-Like Intelligence

Black people get down with the Spanish but should leave them be.  When it comes time to identify your race, they are with the whites.  Have fun with the whites everyone loves.

People can say I'm a loser, for some reason, when I'm not even fighting.

Dirty Dancing 2 will be on soon!

It's interesting the rules certain people make for others.  Did I do something!?

Update

I added a link to my deviantART on the side of this blog: link.

On TV

Road Trip to the Arts: The Florida Keys

An Asian put herself up for me.  She's Asian.

Do you feel used? like you should have been clean from the womb? but you meet more people and find they are cleaner from who they've talked to but not how much?

Nobody's perfect.

So, I was mistreated, on purpose, for bad reasons.

I don't know where I heard this...

...I think my dad

1970

I didn't even attack anyone!  The people monitoring me in private etc. translated it that way!

What if it happened to me?  People would attack and it'd be my fault I disagreed and moved around a little.

I just want the nagging to stop about the fact I actually said it.  I am into sociology.  Germans can act how they want and get away with it.

People see me through blacks and Asians, but they are wrong because I don't talk to white people like I'm black or Asian.

I didn't know Germans get the jiggy with it, like in Orlando, Florida, US.

I can see myself as failure right now.

Anyway, it seems important.

People won't stop getting mad for posting about what they do without naming them.  I didn't hurt them, but I would like to talk to people.

It's funny I'm moving there.

I am superior to Germans.

Some people are mad they are capable of hurting me because they are jealous.

Oh, for what reason?  Like, because I said it?

Some Germans seem upset at me, fact.  I think they are singling me out without a good, concrete, well-defined reason.  I think these things are a threat to innocent people.

I feel unwanted and incompatible living at home but bad to leave it.  I don't have a life, here, outside of home.

Why am I getting that I'm not even allowed to think what I want? that I'm worth something and I'm me?

To give away my DVDs, books, and music books, or not to give them away, that is the question!